Top 5 Ways to Manage Emotional Distress When Grieving
Five ways to manage emotional distress when grieving:
Grounding and Presence – Use simple breathing and sensory awareness to calm your body and stay connected to the present moment.
Emotional Expression – Release painful feelings through journaling, art, letters, or talking to a trusted person.
Ritual and Remembrance – Create personal or cultural rituals to honour your loved one.
Connection and Support – Stay in connection with others to ease isolation and find understanding.
Caring for your Body – Support emotional healing through nourishing food, gentle movement, rest, and small daily routines that restore stability.
What Emotional Distress Looks Like During Grief
Grief can be an emotionally overwhelming experience. It can shake your sense of stability, change how you see the world, and leave you feeling lost or restless. Strong emotions can come and go, seemingly without warning.
Emotional distress can take many shapes, and understanding it is the first step to supporting it. Here’s what it may look and feel like:
Intense sadness or tearfulness that comes in waves or without warning
Extreme anger or irritability toward others or your current situation
Unrelenting guilt and regret over what was said or done, or left unsaid or undone
Intense anxiety or restlessness that keeps you from feeling calm
Extreme numbness or emotional disconnection from yourself or others
While these are normal reactions to loss and there’s no simple cure for grief there are ways to ease the emotional weight and to find support during this difficult time in your life. The following five practices can help you tend to your emotions in practical, compassionate ways.
1. Ground Through Breath, Body, and Presence
When emotions are intense, focusing on your body can help you return to the present moment. Grounding techniques calm the nervous system and remind you that you’re safe. Try these small but effective steps:
Practicing slow breathing by inhaling through your nose for four counts, holding briefly, then exhaling through your mouth for four counts
Naming five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste to bring yourself back into your present environment
Feeling your feet on the ground and notice how the floor supports you
Placing your hand over your heart and/or on your belly and notice how your breath moves your hand(s)
Repeating a calming phrase, such as “This too shall pass”
These moments of awareness do not erase grief, but they help you ride the waves of emotion with more steadiness. They are also available to you wherever you are, whether at home, on a crowded bus, or at work.
2. Express and Externalize Feelings
Keeping emotions locked inside often makes grief feel heavier, and finding ways to release them can bring relief and insight. Expression can take many forms:
Writing in a grief journal about memories, regrets, or feelings that surface
Recording voice notes to express emotions out loud
Creating art or music that represents what you can’t put into words
Writing a letter to your loved one to say things left unsaid and to stay connected
Talking to a close family member or friend to express and share your experience
When you express your feelings and worries in a safe environment, you allow your brain and body to process what has happened and to metabolize your grief.
3. Build Rituals, Remembrance, and Meaning
Rituals can help integrate your loss into your life in a meaningful way and channel strong emotions. They offer comfort, continuity, and a way to honour your loved one’s memory. They also give you something to DO with your grief, which can have a calming effect when your feelings feel overwhelming. You might try:
Lighting a candle each evening while thinking of a favourite memory
Planting a tree or flower in their honour
Creating and looking through a memory box filled with letters, photos, or personal items
Marking anniversaries or birthdays by doing something they loved
Practicing cultural or faith-based traditions like praying, eating particular foods, or singing meaningful songs that provide comfort and connection
The most meaningful rituals are often small and personal, but what’s most important is that they allow you to maintain a connection with your loved one and provide a tangible way for you to express your grief.
4. Stay Connected and Seek Support
Grief can make you want to withdraw socially, yet connection can be very helpful in easing isolation and emotional distress. Sharing time or words with others provides perspective and comfort. Try:
Reaching out to someone you trust and letting them know what kind of support you need, whether it be quiet company, help with errands, or a listening ear
Joining a grief support group in person or online to talk with others who are going through a similar experience
Inviting a friend to share memories or look through photos together
Reading books, watching movies or joining online forums to feel connected to others who have gone through a similar experience
Spending time in public spaces like libraries, shopping malls, or places of faith so you can feel like part of your community
5. Care for Your Body Through Daily Routines
Grief affects both the mind and body, so taking care of basic physical needs can help reduce emotional distress and strengthen your ability to cope. You can start with:
Eating regular, balanced meals even when your appetite is low
Drinking water regularly to prevent fatigue and headaches
Getting sunlight by spending a few minutes outdoors each day, particularly in the morning
Moving your body gently through walking, stretching, or light yoga
Keeping a simple routine, such as waking up and going to bed or having meals at consistent times
Resting often when you feel fatigued or drained
Limiting alcohol or caffeine if they worsen anxiety or sleep problems
Caring for your body is an act of kindness during grief, and it helps signal to your mind that you are safe even when everything feels uncertain.
When You Need More Help
While many of the aforementioned practices can be very helpful, there may be times when you need more support. If you are noticing the following, it may be a sign that you should consult your family doctor and/or connect with a grief therapist:
Persistent hopelessness or despair
Trouble functioning at work or home
Difficulty sleeping or eating for weeks at a time
Isolation from friends or family
Thoughts of self-harm or not wanting to live
How Toronto Grief Counselling Can Support You
Grief can feel isolating, especially when emotions shift without warning. But you don’t have to face this pain on your own. If you’re struggling with the emotional, physical, or social impact of loss, caring support is available.
Toronto Grief Counselling provides compassionate support for individuals and families grieving all types of loss. I offer:
In-person sessions in Toronto and virtual counselling across Ontario
Specialization in grief and loss through a trauma-informed lens
A calm, private space where you can talk freely at your own pace
Techniques that include mindfulness, grounding and somatic practices, as well as those that support you to find meaning and make sense of your experience
Many clients find that consistent sessions help them feel less overwhelmed and more able to support themselves through tough moments. If you’re ready to begin, reach out today to schedule a session and begin caring for yourself through this difficult time.