How Grief Affects You Physically: How To Support Your Body During A Stressful Time

Grief is a holistic experience, which means it doesn’t just affect how you feel emotionally but can also impact how your body feels, too. We often speak of grief in just emotional terms, and you might expect sadness or anger after a loss. What might surprise you is the physical symptoms that can creep up. You may wake up feeling exhausted, have aches and pains, or trouble with digestion.

In this blog, you’ll learn the physical effects of grief, why they happen, and how to care for your body as you heal from loss. Your body deserves the same compassion and care that your heart does.

How Grief Affects the Body

Grief doesn’t just live in the mind or heart but can impact the entire body. After a major loss, your body reacts much like it would to a physical threat. Your nervous system goes into high alert, triggering changes that can leave you feeling wired, tense, or completely worn out. These reactions are part of how grief can affect you physically and can make it hard to go about your day, especially when others expect you to "get back to normal." 

Common Physical Effects of Grief:

• Ongoing muscle tension, especially around your shoulders, jaw, or back

• Unexplained aches and pains

• Sleep disruptions—whether it’s trouble falling asleep or waking too early, sleeping too much or too little

• Changes in appetite or digestion

• A heavy chest, shortness of breath, racing heart

• Extra sensitivity to noise, lights, or people

• Feeling physically wired, or completely fatigued and drained of energy

Why Your Body Reacts During Grief

When you experience the loss of something or someone you are attached to, your nervous system can interpret that as a life threat. As humans we are social animals that rely on our relationships, communities, jobs, hobbies, and physical environments to foster a sense of security, predictability, sense of self, and meaning and purpose. When we suffer a loss, our body interprets that as a threat and responds by going into survival mode.

We may become hyper-aroused: constantly scanning our environment for further threats, body tense and ready to react (think: fight or flight). Or we become hypo-aroused: the body shuts down and tunes out, preserving our energy (think: flop). These kinds of physical responses, while inconvenient and frustrating, are not a weakness. They are part of your body’s natural way of coping with emotional pain and common experiences in grief.

Simple Practices for Physical Relief

Caring for your body during grief doesn’t mean pushing through or forcing yourself to feel better. It means offering yourself comfort in ways that feel doable.

Here are some ways to care for your body during grief:

• Daily movement: gentle stretching, yoga, taking walks, and more vigorous exercising if you can handle it

• Taking a hot shower, snuggling under a blanket, using a heating pad or drinking hot liquids (if hyper-aroused and need to calm down)

• Splashing cold water on your face, letting in cold air, drinking cold liquids (if hypo-aroused and need more energy)

• Taking slow breaths, especially when you feel overwhelmed.

• Staying hydrated, even if it’s just a few sips at a time

• Eating nutritious foods that are easy and familiar, even in small amounts

• Resting when you need to, your body is going through a lot!

• Engaging in supportive, consensual touch: hugging a friend, snuggling a pet, getting a massage

You do not need a perfect routine but trying some of these steps daily can help you create some structure. These practices can support your body and give your nervous system gentle signals that you are safe. 

Signs That You May Need More Support

The physical impacts of grief often soften over time, but sometimes they don’t. If you are experiencing debilitating pain, or significant disruption to your sleep, appetite or physical functioning, it may be time to seek professional support. It is important to follow up with your doctor to receive medical support and to rule out other mental and physical health disorders.

You may also choose to see a massage therapist, physiotherapist or chiropractor if aches and pains linger. It can also be supportive to talk to a grief counsellor or therapist in order to ease your emotional pain and get to the root cause of your physical discomfort. Some counsellors offer somatic therapies that can support you to tune into your body in a safe and structured way.

Conclusion

Grief is not just something you think or feel. It’s something your body carries, too. Maybe you’ve felt more tired than usual. Maybe your appetite has changed, or your muscles ache, or your chest feels tight. These are not random symptoms. They can be physical symptoms of grief. With support, rest, and small daily practices, your body can begin to find ease again.

How Toronto Grief Counselling Can Help

At Toronto Grief Counselling, we understand that grief doesn’t just affect your emotions. It can show up in your body, too, through tension, tiredness, or a general feeling that something’s not right.

Grief Counselling offers a space to slow down and understand what your body is trying to tell you. It can help you find small, steady ways to feel more supported.

Here is what you can expect:

• A grounded, non-judgmental space to talk about physical symptoms of grief

• Support that includes your body, mind, and nervous system

• Guidance on what helps, without pressure to fix anything

• Therapy offered in Toronto and virtually across Ontario

If your body is holding grief in a way that feels heavy or confusing, you are not alone. Support is available when you're ready.

Learn more about grief counselling in Toronto and how we can support you.